My son took it to the next level. He has imaginary frat friends.
Imaginary frat friends aren’t here to keep my kid company, they’re here to wreck his room.
They started small. Used tissues aimed at the trash missed. My son obviously got the “friends” with no athletic ability.
Then wrappers stopped being disposed of properly. Spilled substances with bizarre physical properties were unidentifiable. NASA still has one under study.
My nephew once coined a phrase that perfectly explains the state of my child’s room as it had his at this age: “It looks like someone picked it up and shook it real hard.”
OMG, the imaginary frat friends are relatives!
Lately, they’ve taken over the whole house. They’re especially negligent in putting away any condiment that requires refrigeration and they have a great adversity to pinching closed the fasteners on any Ziplock bag.
Empty cartons of milk show up in the refrigerator, dirty dishes are abandoned wherever they were finished and I saw one of them pissing in the bushes.
I need Ghostbusters!
They’re turning my place into Animal House and they’re doing it without alcohol, illicit drugs, pledging or final exams. The worst part is, I think they’re descendants of mine.
Recently my Facebook post was: “I found something my teenager did and asked him about it. In the process, I discovered there is such a thing as a stupid question.”
My son saw it and phoned me. “Am I in trouble?”
I laughed. “Would you rather I told Facebook that you left your used Q-tips covered with ear soil on the coffee table?”
He laughed and said, “Those weren’t mine!”
~
Back to home.
For more of Cindy, stalk her at the links below or
read her first novel, The Aliquot Sum, written for the new-adult genre. It's
currently in pre-production to be major motion picture!
Ha ha! Children can come up with any excuse. Isn't it? :) It was a fun read
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading! Kids are funny.
DeleteOMG this was priceless! I'm sure there are some out there, but I don't know any parent that can't relate to this "stage" in a teens life! My daughter has never really grown out of it, and she went to a Montessori school!!! Too funny. I love the way you wrote about it. Lisa, co-host AtoZ 2015, @ http://www.lisabuiecollard.com
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading, Lisa. The hardest part of this stage was accepting that he is simply me. ;)
DeleteGreat read! When my twins were younger, instead of imaginary friends they had imaginary moms. Moms who let them eat candy, stay up late, watch movies 24/7, you get the picture. They would refer to their imaginary moms as "my other moms," which I'm sure was confusing to the preschool teachers.
ReplyDeleteOMG, Joanne, that's hilarious! I hope that's your post for "I."
DeleteMy son is an only child too, and looking at his room I'm starting to wonder if he has an imaginary frat friend too. Hmmm...
ReplyDeleteI'd check into it. Also, a friend recently posted something on Facebook that suggested a correlation between clutter and genius. I'll take that!
DeleteOh man, why did I have a second child? I never thought about how if I only had one, I would always know who was to blame. Now with two, how can I ever be sure? (Not to mention factoring in the invisible fraternities)
ReplyDeleteParenting is hard.
I replied yesterday via my cell but obviously that transmission was screwed up by the frat friends too. The only thing I can honestly say about parenting is nothing is ever for sure. And you'll love every minute of it.
Delete;)
OMGoodness this is hilarious! I had a bunch of kids and they never owned up to anything either, ever! Come to think of it my husband is an only husband and he never owns up to any thing either...
ReplyDeleteSo it's universal? I'm starting to think frat friends may have made off with the missing socks too. This could be widespread!
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